"The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt"
Don't Let Your Creative Fears
“Don't give in to your fears. If you do, you won't be able to talk to your heart.”
- Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist
To dream as an artist is to put one's entire heart behind it.
In a way, it's like falling in love: We pour every bit of ourselves behind our art and creative business, so it's inevitable... to wonder "What if it all fails?". Especially since our art comes from such a personal place inside ourselves, we become so terribly afraid. And we end up getting lost - in our own creative fears.
Take the First Step
There was a time when I couldn't make myself do it before either. I too was afraid... However, the moment you first make the decision to take the dive, the next ones after that become so much easier. Before you know it, you'll start taking the risks and trying new things without even worrying about it. Mess ups won't be as traumatizing and the successes stay rewarding without it being such a huge lifeline to your drive.
It was just one year ago (August 2016), that I took the leap.
I had graduated college three months before then and had managed to secure a part-time job to barely sustain myself as I lived with my parents. I stumbled onto passing thoughts and vague ideas and dreams of who I wanted to become... And it was in-fact an identity I was far too terrified to admit at one point in my life. An identity I had shot down in myself when I was a young teenager.
Truthfully - I thought it had died in me.
But we always manage to find a way back.
And you will find a way back. Just as our minds always wander back to things it can't let go. Even after years. Take that as a sign.
I bought some canvases and acrylics and began to paint.
I started writing in old notebooks.
I researched about blogging and starting my own creative business.
I built a foundation in my mind - and a dream as strong as concrete began to form.
From there, it just went up and up -
And still I am building myself up.
Nothing you start out at first will be perfect. And truthfully, in running a creative business, you and your mind are going to play an endless game of tug-of-rope on this subject. Every artist has their own definition and final say of what "perfection" is to them. That is after all, how we deem a work of art as "finished".
What is perfect?
A natural creative will have an eye for it. A vision of what a perfect work of art will look like. And it's that gift - that eye - that'll be your very worst enemy from the beginning. It is what makes you an artist at heart - But it's also what is going to feed the thoughts that see your work and find every wrong detail and tiny bit of imperfection in it.
Let me tell you, by all means start your creative journey. It is only during the process of creating that you will learn to hone your skill and talent. And above all, you will also rediscover and relearn yourself - and begin to understand that "perfect" art isn't at all what you had in mind beforehand.
It's one of the biggest lessons that I learned from my first year of being in the creative business: That art is the redefining of perfect.
Try to work your way into the minds of every artist. Behind their work, you will see their own version of a perfect world.
An unfinished perfect.
Scribbles are perfect.
Grays are perfect.
The human figure is perfect.
It is all perfect.
Failure Isn't That
Big of a Deal
Failure sounds bad. Really bad. But really - it's all in our heads.
The way I see it, most "failures" aren't truly failures at all. Stop seeing every mess-up or outcome of nothing as failure. Instead, change your work to try to get a different outcome and see what works and what doesn't work. And that is merely all that is.
You are allowed to mess up.
Everyone is allowed to mess up.
It's a very human thing and it's sad to see that there are many people out there who expect "perfection" from everyone.
We as people DO NOT and WILL NOT ever grow up without making mistakes.
So welcome it.
You Are Not Alone In This
It may seem like the world is telling you that you can't make it.
I felt the same way. We all felt the same way. But many of us took the leap anyways, spurred on by one or a series of events that made us realize that there was no other way to live besides - to live with art.
...That this was the only way for us to achieve a sense of purpose with our lives.
To find happiness.
I hope in reading this, you find some bit of inspiration and hope to set out on your own creative journey. One of the biggest things that gets to me is when I see how fear keeps others from being happy. It's something that hits me in a very personal way.
I certainly hope with my entire being, that you find a way to be happy. If you need a push in the right direction, I hope this post helped you - in whatever small way.
Feel free to comment down below if you need a safe place to chat about this... or just want to say hello.
And until next time, you guys! I'll see you later. Bye~ :)